Harry Potter and The Three Musketeers?
by eTerNaLzAnzI98
Summary: DiegoHarry Xover Harry Potter/Ice Age. Harry suddenly finds himself staring at a pair of huge canines, and when he tried to push it away, he was left staring at a slick ebony-furred paw oh so dangerously close to that pair of canines.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I don't own HP and IA.

This is an xover of Harry Potter and Ice Age. The main pairing will be DiegoHarry. This was a challenge fic by Primal in AFF. Primal, thank you for such an amazing challenge, I hope that this fic sees to your expectation. This is a very mature fic with swear words and sexual content.

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SMACK. "Owww!" THUMP.

"Stay there and shut up!" shouted one blubber-like figure leaning back on a huge pile of pillows and propping his massive feet on top of one, Harry Potter: Boy-Who-Lived and bravest hero in the wizarding world; punching-bag and freak to his muggle relatives.

"Yeah, you show him, Big-D!" crowed his companion.

"Go on Piers, just turn on the bloody telly!"

Piers complied flipping through channels, looking for interesting shows to watch; ergo, violent and bloody.

"Fuck! There's nothing good on, man!" Piers scowled at the TV in an accusing way. "What should we do now Dud? Should we go Harry-hunting?" He queried, looking at the backside of the aforementioned prey. 'He's got a shapely arse ... for a guy.' He felt his cock give a twitch. His eyes widen slightly in shock, then he suddenly smirked.

All this while, wizarding hero /slash/ footstool was on his hands and knees supporting a weight he doubts even donkeys could carry. He gritted his teeth, both in an effort to stay up and also in frustration.

What the hell is this sack of rotting potatoes he calls his cousin, trying to do to him?! Slowly crush his _freakin'_ spine?! Bloody hell! What the hell was he thinking about?! What the hell was he doing with these two stupid idiots? Oh yeah, he remembers! _"No, thank you Mrs Weasley. It will be safer for all of us if i stay at my relatives."_ 'Stupid, idiotic self!' No matter what- anywhere else is better than the Dursleys'! Even within a house full of _fuckin' _**traitors**!

Great! Now, he's reliving that afternoon! he doesn't know whether to be glad to know the truth or not. Guess Granger's not as know-it-all as she makes herself to be. And, well, there's nothing to say on the account of Ron- he's almost always stupid. But, thank god for dark corners in the Library.

FLASHBACK

_'Stupid lamp breaking! How am I supposed to read the bloody book if I can't even see it?!' Harry said looking at the broken lamp. 'Oh well. I suppose I should just take the books I want; this Magical Creatures You Don't Know And Won't Believe Exists book looks interesting, so I'll take this. Aaand this book which I can't see the title of..' Harry squinted his eyes to see better in the dark. He moved forward to better decipher the title of the book. CLATTER. He looked down to see his wand had fallen off his pocket; he picked it up. He was about to put it away when he suddenly felt like he could smack himself silly. How could he forget! He's a bloody wizard, was he not? _

_He was about to cast _Lumos_ when he heard the distinct sound of hurried steps and swishing of cloaks. He heard them stop to the other side of the book case he was looking at. That side was the further-most corner of the Library; meaning, the most favourite spot of naughty couples. Harry rolled his eyes. 'Another horny couple who can't keep their hands to themselves.' Moan. 'Oh God, I better go. I don't want to have another acronym to me: Boy-Who-Peeks.' _

_But before he could move away he heard sounds of flesh hitting each other. Harry's eyes bugged out. 'Fuckin' hell! They're shagging in there!' He heard more sounds of pants, moans and grunts. 'Aw great! Now I have a problem! I really better go, to get away from that AND to take care of this!'_

_"Ro-ho-nn."_

_'What?'_

_"H'mione."_

_Harry's eyes widen. 'Oh, eewww!' There goes his erection. Bye-bye .. maybe forever. He never wanted to know his best friends activity this ... intimacy. The he heard them shout in a whisper, their climax. Harry closes his eyes. 'Whhyy? Why me?!' He also noticed how they climaxed far too quickly, but before that thought could go any further, he murdered it with a machette._

_"Oh no. I forgot to put on the contraceptive spell." whispered Hermione._

_"Don't worry. If you ever get pregnant we can just say its Potter's, then he'll have to pay for the child." whispered Ron conspiratorially._

_Harry stopped. 'What?! That good-for-nothing lousy best friend! I pity him. Hermione's gonna beat him to a pulp! GO Hermione!'_

_"That won't work, stupid!" Harry smiled. "No one's gonna fall for that! We'll have to take make it much more elaborately." Harry's smile dropped._

_'Wha-? She's in with him?!' He thought, then felt like he could smack himself .. for a second time that day. 'Well, duuhh! Of course she's with him! She __**fucking **__him!' _

_"We could polly-juice you into him. And then you could rape me. But we after that we can't tell everbody yet. We need him to kill You-Know-Who first, and __**then**__ we can tell everbody. And then we can have claim to all his money as compensation!"_

_Harry was shocked. His own best friends conspiring to get him thrown to Azkaban to get to his money. That's just so.. shocking. These are the people whom he grew up with in what he thought was the better part of his life. Turns out they're just like the rest of them. Seeing him for what he was and not for who he is. And worst, parading around as his most trusted and loyal friends while behind his back they're actually stabbing harshly at him._

_God! His whole life was a catastophe!_

_"Yeah, you're so clever Hermione." Ron purred .. well, attempted to. He sounded like someone was strangling him._

_"No-no, that won't work. We need to think this through better. Let's go back to the common room, see if he's already there. Maybe we can get some of his hair to make the Polyjuice potion. Well, IF we still go though with that plan. I think I - I mean-_ **we** _could make a better plan than this. But just in case we need it, we should still get it. Come on."_

_Harry heard them move and he quickly and silently shuffled to the furthest and darkest corner hoping they don't see him again. They didn't. _

_END FLASHBACK_

All the while, Dudley and Peirs were silently communicating about their plan to have 'fun'. Harry was still having more flashbacks of the remaining weeks he had in Hogwarts with his friends, well, his ex-friends and to say it was awkward was a big understatement. He had decided to pretend not to know what happened and instead tried to avoid them as much as possible, opting to stay in the library to do study and do his work. Of course he had to arrange his timing so that he wasn't there when one of the two were. So it came as a complete shock when the wieght on his back disappeared and he found himself sprawled on the bed.

The doorknob twists.

"Shit! I didn't even hear them in the driveway!" Dudley cursed, thinking his parents came home earlier than was expected. By now they had stripped Harry of all his clothing and tied his hands to the headboard. He struggled at first but with a firm punch to his stomach had him paralyzed for a few precious seconds. Dudley and Piers both hadn't had time to pull up their pants when the door swung open to their shocked and frightened faces. Harry gave a relieved sigh, 'I'm safe.'

The figure stepped inside and all hopes of survival was dashed in Harry's mind. For there stood a man garbed in a black cloak and a white mask, He -for he was tall and broad-shouldered- had his hood down and for that showed of his shoulder-length blond hair that is a trademark for only one prestigious _pureblooded _Dark family: the Malfoys. His face, if it weren't covered in the white mask would have shown utter shock equalling, maybe even rivaling that of the teens.

Dudley was the first to act. He pulled up his pants, quickly followed by his minion, and started to shriek at the figure. "It's one of you freaks again! What the fuck are you doin' here?! You're not supposed to be here until the end of summer! Get out, I'm tellin' Dad!" In his mind he's still terrified of the 'freaks', but with a Championship belt in boxing gave him enough boost and courage to stand up to them. Peirss looked on in utter confusion; not only because Dudley knew these weird people but he was also afraid of them, if the slight tremor in his voice was any indication; that, or he needed to go to the GP to check out his ears. Besides these people were only equiped with sticks. What are they gonna do? Poke them in the eye, demanding something whilst threatening to poke the other eye?! Pierss laughed in his head.

The regal-like man stood there silently contemplating all that his eyes are unbelievably seeing. For there naked and tied to the bed, not to mention -totally vulnerable- was Harry Potter, Boy-Who-Lived-To-Defeat-The-Dark-Lord, whom everyone thought was treated like a Royal Prince, was about to be raped,; in his own home and by his own cousin, had it not been for his interruption.

"Do you have any idea who you've just tried to rape?" Lucius asked rhetorically. In all honesty, he had absolutely no idea how to feel in this situation; where instead of he and his fellow Death Eaters, the ones who were supposed to mime and torture Potter, they were replaced by a couple of teenage riff-raffs that had no idea what they were doing!

Harry had never been so afraid in his life; not even when he was with Moldypants and the Dementors. Sure the Dursleys roughed him up a little, but never outright do something against the law! He never thought he would be placed in such an extremely humiliating vulnerability and defilation.

AND, to make things worse, the Munch Bunch arrived! He pulled his legs closer to himself to obscure his family jewels and tugged harder on his restraints. Stupid. Flipping. Restraints! AARGH! ... Oh, Crap! If Malfoy's here, who else is there?

Cackle! "Oooh! I can see wittle Potter's Wittle wee-wee!" Cackle. 'Bellatrix Lestrange.' stated Harry in his mind, desolately.

Blushing even more,he pulled his legs closer to himself. And suddenly he found himself with a lap-full of Malfoy. It all happened so fast he didn't even notice Dudley and Pierss being stunned and dragged out of the room.

"Well, well, well. What have we here?" and Harry heard the voice of the only person who could make his balls jump up to his throat and choke on it -hopefully to die.

There standing at the doorway, was Voldermort, aka his Stalker.

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Finished for now. Please leave a review.


	2. Chapter 2

"Lucius." the tall man stated. In just that voice held authority and instilled fear. His face was no longer a resemblance of a snake's but more of a human's, all except for his glinting red eyes. He was taller than Malfor Senior but all also thinner. He glanced a mere second on Lucius before focusing his attention to the naked boy on the bed.

"Yes, My Lord." Lucius immediately stood up from his previously comfortable position, bowed and then left. The muggle boys were already taken downstairs and were being tortured, if the music in Voldemort's ears were any indication.

Voldemort looked down at the Saviour of the World, naked and completely vulnerable -in more ways than one. His wand was in the room next door and he was currently naked and alone with his arch-nemesis. He had his knees held up close to his chest in an attempt to cover up, not knowing that he's actually exposing more than he's hiding.

In one swoop the he was upon the enticing body. He smirked down at the frightened face the child; giddy with excitement and lust. He gazed upon what he called a 'perfect picture'. Ebony locks surrounded the young boys face, swept away from covering those gorgeous emerald orbs. Parted pink lips, glossed by the slick tongue darting past those petals and caressing them. HE looked down at the legs covering the other's chest. It was a seductive ivory white, seemingly hairless, but upon closer inspection -really close- he could see very thin and very fine hair. His gaze swept further down, coming to a stop at the sight the Saviors young sack: no wrinkle, no hair and tinged pink. He licked his lips, suddenly feeling parched with all the heat he's feeling. He pushed the boy's knees closer to his chest -and there it is, his pink puckered entrance. His cock, which was slowly hardening with all the sight, arose with gusto. Just the thought of stretching that tight hole, had him thrusting his hips.

The moment Harry felt the thrust and the unmistakeable arousal of his nightmare, had him startled out of his shocked stupor. "Wh-what're you doing?!" he embarrassedly noticed his high-pitched voice.

Voldemort scowled when Harry started struggling and cast quick spell equivalent to a rape-drug. Immediately Harry's body went lax. The older man grinned as he watched emerald orbs become hazy. He took hold of the boy's ankles spread them apart,exposing Harry in all his glory -and what a glory indeed! He licked a path starting from his puckered entrance all the way to his lips, liking the way the boy arched the part of his body that was touched by his wicked tongue.

He licked the other's lips pulling away when the other darted his tongue to meet his. He wanted submission from the young teen, yes, the boy was a little bit influenced but that only affects the heightened sense of pleasure he gets he is touched sensually. The more he experiences it, the more he wants it. He flicked his tongue at those petals before a whimper of frustration escaped them, sounding like a child denied a treat.

His hands wandered, roaming down the teen's back, past his taut stomach, up to his chest where they stayed there to play with his cute nubs. He devoured his mouth, his tongue touching every corner and crevice, giving attention to the other tongue when it came to play.

Harry's abandoned legs wrapped around the older male's waist and his hips started grinding upwards. Voldemort moaned, his own hips thrusting down in response. His lips pulled away from the soft petals to plant themselves on the delicate neck, leaving raw bruise-like marks before trailing down with tender pecks on the hardened nubs being teased with flicks and pinches. His lust spiking with every moan and whine he produced from the the younger male.

Voldemort unlocked Harry's legs from around his waist and pushed his ankles down until they were touching the space on either side of his face. Voldemort nuzzled the soft globes raised to his face and parted them. He saw the pink pucker winking with want at him. He tapped it with his wand, ensuring it's clean, and with the way the other was moaning, he'd say the boy like it too. He gave brief licks around it, ignoring the inviting entrance fro a while. Harry pushed his butt up to his face wanting contact with his entrance. Voldemort smirked; he nuzzled it and kissed it before licking it in every way. Harry's voice reached a new decibel. He was pretty sure everyone downstairs could hear the unmistakeable arousal in that voice.

Voldemort's tongue pushed past the tight ring of muscle and wiggled around; making Harry hitch a breath mid-moan. He thrust his tongue in and out in an imitation of what's to come, then wrapped his lips around the petals and sucked. At this Harry let out a lustful scream.

The wicked tongue inside of Harry had electricity shoot up and down his spine making his whole body shake with tremors. Harry felt ice cold feeling in his feet before it shot up to his abdomen where it became a ball of fire. A hand larger than his reached over and started to pump his member; the ball of fire steadily growing bigger and whiter.

"Ahh ... ah .. please .. " Harry panted. He didn't know what he wanted and what it was exactly that he was pleading for, but all he knew was that this white ball of fire was too much for him to take, his body was already trembling in the intense pleasure he was drowning in. The hand tightened and became faster, and suddenly the ball of fire exploded with a flash of white. His seed was raining down on his chest, face and some even went inside his mouth as he screamed. He swallowed, tasting his own essence.

"Aren't you happy?" the voice above him stated rousing him from his pleasure addled stupor. He opened his eyes, realising he had closed it with the intense pleasure. The older male watched in satisfaction as the younger stared dazedly at him before nodding hazily.

"Would you like some more?" he asked, with an innocent voice, making eye-contact while he rubbed his face between the globes and making the boy's still half-hard member to sway in his face, left-over cum dripping on his face.

He nodded again. The older male smiled. He lowered the other's body on the bed before spelling the restraints off. Immediately, small hands latched on his cloak pulling him closer. His legs were once again wrapped around the other's waist inside the cloak. He pulled the cloak closer, and the the other's face was close enough, he raised his head to meet the other's lips. Voldemort, only startled for a moment, before pushing down responding with much strength. Voldemort spelled his clothes off, all except his cloak which the younger male still had a vicious grip on. He completely lowered his body on the smaller male, ensuring the cloak was wrapped around them, and a mass of his skin was in direct contact with the smaller male's.

He released the other's lips with a loud smack and leaned back. His arousal was comfortably nestled between the soft globes. His hips was slowly thrusting against the soft mound his hardened member gently rubbing in between them; the pucker winking against it making soft sounds, as it seems to be sucking on the member's skin.

He pushed the smaller male's knees to his chest where the other clutched them in place. His ruby orbs locked on to emerald ones. He gave a brief, and what he thought was a reassuring smile before returning his attention downwards. He slapped his member against the pucker, his precum slipping out. He rubbed his tip around the entrance, spreading precum as a lubricant. He positioned himself. He looked back up at the smaller male's face before entering and saw the pained look that quickly overcame the other's feaures. It was slick but still very tight. It felt sooo good!

Harry scrunched his face in pain and whimpered. Voldemort rubbed his hands on the smaller's thighs deftly avoiding his member. Touching it would only make it harder for him to enter and painful for the other. He was being unusually kind to the boy; but that's to be expected, after all he had fallen in-love with his own enemy. But it wasn't the same kind of falling in-love in the normal way, because he had not necessarily fallen in-love with the boy but with his power.

It was when he was but a twelve year old, when he defeated his 16 year old horcruxe. Not only was he gifted with the art of parseltongue but he's also teeming with power. As to be expected of the boy who was prophesised to vanquish him. Even now, not only was there a thin sheen of sweat on his skin but also a low thrum of power rippling close to his skin, and where his skin touched the other, the magic thrummed faster caressing his skin and also his power in such a way that he knew that when they finally find completion, there would be no more Harry Potter; there would be no more Tom Marvolo Riddle aka Voldemort, there would only be him and him, there would only be magic. This coincidentally makes the prophesy null and void. He pushed his hips more, his eyes glinting in excitement of what was to come. His head was only halfway inside, just a little more and his head would be completely inside.

SLAM!!

Voldemort glared at the person who dared interrupt him. This person was sure to be dead before the end of the day. It was Malfoy and before he could crucio him to oblivion, he rushedly spoke, "My Lord, we need to go! Dumb-galore and the Roasted Ducks are here!!"

Voldemort cursed! So close! Harry was whining now and pushing his entrance to take in more of Voldemor's thick member. "My Lord! Please, we need to go! We'll take Potter with us and then you can finish there without any interruptions!" Malfoy pleaded. If Potter was in his right state of mind he would be staring unbelievingly at him, but seeing as he's not, Malfoy was eternally grateful.

The other's came inside the room and began casting the most advanced and dark spells and hexes on the door. There was a considerably smaller amount of people than when they first arrived. Outside they could hear shouts of spells and also assurances to save Harry. There was also the occasional painful scream as they activated the hexes on the door.

They turned to witness the arousing sight of their Master dominating the World's Saviour. They watched as Potter whined for their Lord to enter him, and wriggle and tremble in pleasure. They were all imaging they were in the position of one of the two. "Alright." He slipped out of Harry before picking him up. "Nott! Have you taken down the Anti-Apparition wards?"

"Yes, My Lord."

"What are you fools waiting for then?!"

BANG! The door was obliterated to pieces some spraying at them. Bellatrix and Nott quickly cast a shield but not before 1 or 2 spells shot towards Voldemort and more specifically the bundle he's carrying. Harry screamed feeling his whole body heating up to a whole new level of pain. Voldemort also feeling this only managed to hold on to him for a few more seconds before giving in and dropping him like a glowing ember, indeed he was actually glowin ember.

In a flash Harry was gone, and the only evidence that he fell was the broken TV still sparking electricity. Voldemort cursed and the Death Eaters feared for their life because they knew that when they are back to safety, they are actually back to hell. In a millisecond, they too were gone.

"Noooo!" shouted Remus, feeling his only connection to family -to pack- was gone. His cub was gone. He felt tears of frustration and loss build up, blurring his sight. He felt a pat on his shoulder and heard a soft voice.

"Don't worry Remus, we'll find him. He wasn't with You-Know-Who, that we know." consoled Tonks.

"But we were too late! Why couldn't we just have him stay at Grimmauld?" despaired Remus.

"The boy is hurting too much from the recent loss-" started Dumbledore.

"And I don't?! He needs company! He needs an understanding family there for him. And as do I!" Remus interrupted.

All were silent. Unusual for Snape who would normally be seen sneering at this kind of drama.

"Let's all head back to Headquarters, so that we can start on start on finding Harry. I'll stay here to explain matters to the Ministry officials." stated Dumbledore. With that they all left, Tonks leading Remus with a hand on his shoulder, Snape sneering from behind. They knew that Dumbledore will handle the Ministry goons. As they left no one noticed the empty DVD case which had the piture of a mammoth, a sloth, a sabertooth and a squirrel clutching an acorn.


End file.
